SDMX (somniamagus) wrote,


Time is moving in pulses now, lurching forward out of control, sharp jerks that tug the memories of the recent past out of my hands. I get headaches. Nauseated. All I want to do is sleep and all I do work.

My grandfather is dying much more quickly now, barely surviving a manslaughter attempt by vastly incompetent nursing home staff. Before his last visit to the hospital, he spoke frequently about continuing to drive, going to dances, etc. The script has changed. After more than a decade of cancer, I prepared myself for this moment a long time ago. For years, I was far more prepared for my grandfather's death than my grandfather was. Until this week, of course.

I miss you.
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